Have Yourself a Plum Morelli Christmas
by mmldt
Summary: A Cupcake Christmas story ... Joe & Steph celebrate their first Christmas as parents.
1. Chapter 1

_**Just borrowing some of JE's characters for a while, not making any money, etc.**_

_~ I haven't had much interest in writing lately, but I couldn't let Christmas pass without a J/S story.  
Not sure where this is headed, so I'll just have fun with it and see where it takes me. Enjoy! ~_

* * *

I stood watching as a chubby arm reached out towards the tree. Tiny fingers softly touched the needles, and a happy gurgling sound immediately followed.

"Your very first Christmas tree," Joe said, planting a kiss on top of Joey's head. He lifted him higher in his arms and settled him against his shoulder. "So what do you think of all these lights?" he asked him. Joe glanced over in my direction, and his smile was contagious. "I bet I know. You're wondering what they taste like, aren't you?" He patted Joey on the back and walked over to the fireplace, where six stockings now hung. "Look at that. Mommy even has stockings for Bob and Rex." Joey reached out to touch one but wasn't fast enough. He started to fuss at Joe about that but then seemed to suddenly remember that he still had his fist. It promptly made its way inside his mouth, and he was once again content.

I walked over to him and leaned in for a kiss. His little chubby cheeks were red, and drool was dripping from his chin, but I couldn't have cared less. And thankfully Joe didn't either. He didn't even seem to notice that the right side of his shirt was almost completely soaked.

"So, little man, what do you think Santa's going to bring you?" He carefully lifted Joey up and took a whiff. "How 'bout some diapers? We can definitely use more diapers."

I laughed softly and then turned at the sound that interrupted our peaceful moment. "Uh-oh," I said to Joey, giving him a little tickle under his chin. "Someone still sounds cranky."

I made my way up the stairs and into the nursery, quietly pushing open the door and tiptoeing over to the crib. All thoughts of settling the baby back down were immediately squashed when I saw two arms reaching up to me. Someone was wide awake, and more sleeping was probably the last thing that was going to happen. A pair of gorgeous brown eyes stared up at me, and my heart melted at the sight of the tiny tears that were rolling down that pitiful looking face.

"Oh, sweetie," I said, reaching down and gently picking up my baby girl. "Are those gums still bothering you?" I nuzzled her to me and began to gently bounce her in my arms. "It's alright," I said soothingly as she continued to cry in my ear. "Come on, angel. Let's get you a clean diaper and go see Daddy and Joey."

Joey was still chewing his fist, but he was now sitting in his exersaucer, or as we called it, his bouncy seat. He held his arms up towards me and bounced violently up and down, making as much noise as possible. "I know, I know. You want to be free." Bob walked by, and Joey reached out to grab his tail. Poor Bob. He had absolutely no idea what was in store for him in the coming months. Joey and Jessica couldn't be contained forever.

Joe set two plates down on the coffee table and walked over to me. "Come here, princess." He took Jessie from my arms and motioned with his head towards the couch. "I made sandwiches. Hopefully we have enough time to sit here and eat before you have to feed them again."

In the short time that I had been gone, Joe had not only changed Joey's diaper but had also prepared food for us and started a fire. The living room was warm and cozy, and as I glanced over to the window, I noticed that snowflakes had started to fall.

I was often amazed at how quickly my life had changed, but it was definitely for the better. When we'd found out we were expecting not just one, but two babies, I have to admit I had serious moments of panic. I couldn't even begin to imagine how I was going to handle it, but I knew, with Joe as my partner, we'd do just fine. And with the holiday upon us, I was feeling even more sentimental and sappy. All I wanted was to enjoy my babies and spend as much time as possible with the man that I love.

Joe settled Jessie into her bouncy seat, and I gave both of them a handful of Cheerios. Joe dimmed the lights, then turned on the CD player, and the sounds of Alvin, Simon, and Theodore filled the air. "Don't ever say I'm not a romantic," he said with a teasing grin.

I snuggled closer to him on the couch and wrapped my arm around his waist, giving him a side hug. "This is perfect," I said on a sigh. "I couldn't think of a better way to spend our evening." And I really couldn't.

* * *

Jessie had a rough night, so the following morning Joe gave the most wonderful Christmas present early: _He let me sleep late_.

Thankfully by the time I'd gobbled down my second piece of toast, I was actually starting to feel human again.

"_Yum_," I told Jessie and Joey. "Rice cereal mixed with breast milk and pears. Is Daddy spoiling you or what?" I sat down next to Joey and picked up the spoon from his bowl. Joe scooped another spoonful into Jessie's mouth, and I watched as she smiled at him and beat her hands on her highchair tray.

"Sure, _now_ you're happy. Where was that happy girl last night?" Jessie simply grinned at me and dripped cereal and pears down onto her tray. I fed Joey a spoonful and watched as he immediately replaced the spoon with his fist. "I hope he outgrows that," I said to Joe. "Imagine if he starts kindergarten, and he does that in front of the other kids." He sucked his fist a bit longer, and when he finally removed it from his mouth, it was covered in pears.

"I don't think he wants any more." I grabbed a cloth and began wiping him up. "You're a mess," I said to him in my goofy baby-talk voice, planting kisses all along the back of his neck, which resulted in a chorus of giggles. "_Yes you are_. Who wants to take a bath?"

Joe stood and walked to the sink, rinsing out a washcloth. "Yeah, I think Miss Messy here is finished, too. We'll be right behind you."

Just as I was getting Joey settled in the bathtub, I heard the phone ring. I stopped the water long enough to listen for Joe to call me to the phone, but as the silence stretched on, I decided it was okay to start the water back up again. "Yay! It's not for Mommy. Maybe I'm going to have an entire day where everyone leaves me alone." I squeezed water from the washcloth down his tummy, and he splashed and kicked, soaking me in the process. "This is your favorite time of the day, isn't it? You _love_ your bath."

Unfortunately Jessie wasn't as thrilled with bathtime as Joey was. As soon as Joe walked into the room, she started to squirm and squeal, making her displeasure immediately known. Joe, however, was unphased. He lowered her into her bath ring and sat down on the floor beside me.

"So," he said, pausing long enough to grab a washcloth and squeeze baby wash onto it, "my mother just called."

"No."

He raised an eyebrow at me and grinned. "_No_?" he repeated teasingly. "You don't even know what she wanted."

"Joe, you know I love your mother, and I know she means well, but whatever it is, the answer will still be no."

"_Cupcake _..."

"Don't_ Cupcake_ me," I said weakly. "It's not going to work." Jessie began wiggling restlessly around in her seat, and Joey reached out, trying to touch her head. I handed her a bath toy, and it went straight to her mouth. Joey watched for a moment, and then he leaned over the side of his ring, trying to take the toy from her hand.

"Would you hand me that blue fish over there, and stop smiling at me like that. That's not going to work either." I was trying to be strong, but who was I kidding? No matter what Joe said or did, it _always _worked. I was way too susceptible to his charms, and we both knew it.

Joe leaned over the side of the tub and gave Joey the fish, then scooted closer to me. My eyes wandered to his muscular arms, and all thoughts of what we were discussing floated from my mind. "It's nothing bad," I finally heard him saying. I glanced up into his eyes and nearly lost my train of thought all over again. "I promise." He gave me a nudge then planted a light kiss on my lips. "My mother just wants to know if we can have the Christmas Eve meal here at our house. That's all."

I furrowed my brow and gave him a long, hard stare. "Why?" I asked suspiciously. "No one ever wants to do anything over here."

Joe shrugged his shoulders and finished rinsing off Jessie. "I don't know. It has something to do with Tony and Gabriella and Gabriella's parents. I guess she lied to them about it being at our house, so Mom's trying to save face. I wasn't really listening. But the point is, no matter what reason is behind it, I think it'd be nice to have everyone here at our place. Especially since it's the twins' first Christmas."

I let out a sigh and frowned. "I don't suppose Grandma Bella's gone to New York again?" She'd spent Thanksgiving there, and it had been the most enjoyable holiday in as long as I could remember.

"No such luck," he said with a laugh.

I thought about having Joe's family at our house and suddenly realized I'd already promised my mother we would spend Christmas Eve with them. "Oh no," I moaned. "Please tell me you didn't already say yes?!"

"Why?" Joe asked sheepishly. "Would it really be that miserable for you to have everyone here?"

"Aside from Grandma Bella, no. It's just that I've already promised my mom that we'd be spending Christmas Eve with them."

"_Oh._ Well that's no big deal," Joe said nonchalantly. "We'll just invite your family over, too."

I started to ask him if he'd lost his mind, but before I could, Joe reached behind him and grabbed a bath towel, then proceeded to lift Joey from his ring.

"Wait a second," I whined, momentarily distracted. "Why do _you_ get him? I thought you were taking care of Miss Fussy Pants today? I want to keep Joey for a while longer."

Joe just laughed and wrapped Joey in the towel, heading off to the nursery. "_No way_. I've done my time this morning," he called out. "It's your turn now."

I looked down to see our daughter violently spinning the beads on her bath ring, and I could tell a tantrum was rising. "This is so not fair," I told her. "You have _his_ temper. He should be the one to suffer." I grabbed a towel and then lifted her from the ring, kissing the soft curls above her ear. "You can be mad all you want," I said, "but at least you smell like a clean baby now." I lifted the hood onto her head, and that was all it took. The sound of her screaming was immediately followed by Joe's laughter.

"Like mother, like daughter," he said as we walked into the room. Joey, of course, was completely dressed and happily lying in his crib, watching his mobile turn above him.

I raised my eyebrow and quickly thrust Jessie into his arms. "_Hey_," he started, but I was already making my escape.

"Gotta shower ... so much to do since we're having everyone here tomorrow night." I shut the bathroom door just as I heard Joe playfully saying, "Your Mommy is a naughty girl. _Yes she is_."

The Plum and Morelli families. Together. At our house. _Oh boy ..._


	2. Chapter 2

_Many thanks to those who have been kind enough to review! It is most definitely appreciated, and it's nice to know the story is being enjoyed. :) I'll try not to disappoint you.  
I know this isn't a very long chapter, but since I may not have a chance to write for the next two days, I wanted to get this posted tonight. I'll try to have another chapter up soon._

_Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to my fellow Plum fans!_

_

* * *

_

"Alright Momma Steph," Lula was saying, "you gotta get serious with this grocery list."

"I know," I said on a sigh. "I just don't want to." I dropped my pencil and picked up a Boston Creme, finally giving in to temptation. "It's just that it's more fun to hide out here with you two instead of fight my way through a sea of carts in those narrow aisles at Shop 'n Save. Have I mentioned before how much I _hate_ grocery shopping?"

"Ain't you worried that Officer Hottie's gonna come looking for you?" Lula asked, grabbing what was, if I was counting correctly, her fifth jelly doughnut. "You left him at home with them babies over an hour ago, and you still haven't made it to the store. It won't be long, and he's gonna start worrying about you."

I licked chocolate icing off of my fingers and ran them lightly over my jeans. "No, I've got it covered." I tried to stifle a laugh, but it escaped anyway. "I told him I had a few last minute gifts to pick up before I stop at the grocery store. He doesn't know I finished all of my Christmas shopping over a month ago."

Lula laughed at that and then shrugged her shoulders. "Well, I've got no right to judge. Tank thinks I've been out shopping every night, but instead, me and Connie've been patronizing the clubs every night for the past two weeks." Lula smiled proudly at that announcement and poked me in the arm. "You heard that, right? I said 'patronizing.' That's an impressive word, huh?"

Connie shook her head in disgust at both of us and continued polishing her nails. "That's what's great about being single. I don't have to lie to anyone about what I do or where I go."

Lula and I looked at each other, then stared Connie down. "_Alright, alright_," she confessed. "I don't exactly see marriage in my future any time soon, but _maybe,_ every now and then, I wish I had someone to lie to like you two have."

I thought about that for a moment and then frowned. "You know, that sounds pretty bad." I glanced over at Lula. "We're good wives, right? I mean, most women tell little white lies to their husbands, don't they? _Right_?"

Lula shoved a file into the cabinet and turned back in our direction. "See, that's the problem with you, girl. Your conscience is always getting in the way. And you know already what I'm gonna say about that. It's the little white lies that keep a marriage strong. Ain't no way you getting a divorce as long as you got a little healthy lying going on. I mean, come on. I know Tank lies to me, too. He says he's sticking to his diet eatin' all that healthy crap at RangeMan, but I know the truth. When Ranger sends him out, he stops off at Fanny's Burgers for a triple cheeseburger and extra large fries. Ain't no way that man's living off of turkey subs and salads."

I frowned again. "There isn't a single thing that you just said that makes me feel better, Lula." I reached into my purse and grabbed my cell phone, immediately hitting speed dial. "Hey," I said sweetly as soon as I heard Joe's voice. "I just wanted to let you know I stopped off at Vinnie's for a little while. I'm going to the grocery store as soon as I leave here."

I paused and ignored Lula's shaking head. "Uh, no, I finished Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving." I chewed my bottom lip. "Did I say that? _Oh_. Umm, I guess I was confused." I imagined Joe rolling his eyes at me, so I added a little more sweetness to my tone of voice. "So how are the babies?" I listened patiently as he gave me a full report, and then I blurted out, "_Okay, okay. I lied_. I knew I was coming here all along. I just wanted to get out of the house for a little while and eat a doughnut and gossip with Connie and Lula. And not think about the disaster that's hitting our house tomorrow." I took a deep breath and plopped myself down onto the couch, feeling awful for having lied to Joe.

I listened as he tried his best to convince me that Christmas Eve was not going to be a disaster, and then I hung up and stared down the remaining Boston Cremes. I was so tempted to have another one, but the thought of what all that sugar would do to my milk and what that, in turn, would do to Joey and Jessie, kept me in check.

Instead I took a deep breath and reached for my coat. "Okay, I've got to get out of here. The grocery store's going to be packed, and everything's going to be picked over by the time I get there." I slipped into my coat and felt around the outside of my pockets, trying to find my keys. "Wish me luck, ladies."

I headed for the door, but before I walked out, I turned back to Lula. "Oh, and you're wrong about Tank. He's not eating Fanny's Burgers. He and Cal stop at SubZero at least three times a week for their Kobe beef burgers. Apparently Ranger isn't the only one at RangeMan with expensive taste."

"That son of a ..." I heard Lula saying as I shut the door. I smiled to myself as I made my way to Joe's SUV, feeling thankful I'd told him the truth _and _that I was driving his car instead of my heap.

* * *

I'd just brought in the last of the groceries and was struggling to shut the door when Joe's cell phone started ringing. "Joe?" I called out, but he didn't answer. I figured he was upstairs with Joey and Jessie, probably trying to get them down for their nap, so I grabbed his phone and answered. That wasn't something I normally did, but with it being the day before our much dreaded holiday dinner, I had hopes it was someone from his family calling to ask what dish they could bring.

"Yes," a man's voice said as soon as I answered, "I'm calling about the Ducati. Is it still for sale?"

"I'm sorry," I replied, obviously confused. "I'm afraid you have the wrong number." As he recited Joe's number to me, I realized his voice had a familiar sound to it.

"Who is this?" I asked hesitantly, a feeling of disgust suddenly washing over me.

"This is Richard Orr, and I'm calling to talk to someone about the Ducati you have advertised for sale. Perhaps there's someone else there I can speak with? More specifically, someone who knows what they're talking about and what's going on."

"Oh my gosh. You are such a jerk," I spat out, fighting the urge to hang up on him.

"I beg your ..."

"Cut the crap, Dickie. It's me. Stephanie."

"_Stephanie?_ Oh dear God ..."

"How did you get Joe's number? And why are you asking about his Duc? It's not for sale. And if it were for sale, you're the last person on earth who I'd let him sell it to."

"It most certainly _is_ for sale," he replied in his sickeningly nasal tone. "The question I want _you_ to answer is if it's still available. It's a simple yes or no, Stephanie. Certainly that can't be too complicated, even for you."

"No, it's not available!" I yelled in his ear. "Happy now?"

He started to speak, but I interrupted him. "I may not have a Ducati to sell you, but here's a tip, free of charge. Helmets ... they're overrated."

"Cute. Real cute. Always a pleasure, Steph-," and that was the last I heard as I hit the disconnect button.

I'd just put away the last of the groceries when Joe came into the kitchen. "Hey Cupcake," he said, pulling me to him for a kiss. "Glad to see my little liar made it home safe and sound."

I poked out my bottom lip and frowned. "You know I'm sorry about that, right? I just had a ..."

He put his finger against my lips and shushed me softly. "I'm teasing." He gave me a hug and reached around me, grabbing a carrot from the bowl I was about to give Rex. "I'm starving. How about I defrost some meatballs, and we make our own subs?"

"Sounds good. Think I have time to eat before Joey and Jessie are ready to eat?"

He grabbed another carrot and opened the freezer. "Probably not. I peeked in on them right before I came downstairs, and there was a lot of movement going on." He popped the container of meatballs in the microwave and pressed some buttons. "Why don't you start feeding them now, and by the time you're finished, I should have supper ready."

"Alright." My thoughts drifted to the evening before and how much I'd enjoyed it, and I realized how anxious I was to have that again. Our vacations were going to be over with much too quickly, and I wanted to make certain we made the most of our time together before we both had to go back to work.

I was almost out the door when I remembered Dickie. "Oh, by the way, I just had the strangest conversation ..." But before I could finish my sentence, the sound of our crying babies interrupted me. "I'll tell you while we're eating," I said, and then I made my way upstairs to spend some quality time with my two little angels.


	3. Chapter 3

_My apologies for taking this long, but I haven't had as much time to write as I thought I would. I'll try to get this story wrapped up and completed soon, but in the meantime, here's another chapter. I know it's rather short, but I hope you'll enjoy it just the same._

_I also want to say thank you to everyone who has taken the time to post such nice reviews. It definitely keeps me encouraged to continue writing.  
I do have about 2/3 of a chapter written for "Just a Matter of Time" that I'll try to get completed as soon as this story is finished,  
whenever that may be. _

* * *

I'd just settled the twins in their bouncy seats and was about to bite into my sub, when the phone rang. "Ugh," I moaned. "That'll be my mother."

"I'll pause the movie," Joe said, picking up the remote.

"No, don't do that. It's for Joey and Jessie anyway." I patted Jessie softly on the head as I walked by her, then reached for the phone that was still on the floor by the tree. "Might as well go ahead and eat," I told Joe. "This will probably take a while."

I checked the caller ID on the phone, then let out a sigh and clicked on. "Hi Mom." I stood listening, then made my way into the kitchen so I could give my mother a complete inventory of everything I'd bought at the grocery store.

* * *

Thirty minutes later I flounced back into the living room and plopped down onto the couch. The television was off, Joe's plate was empty, and Bob was eyeing what was left of my sandwich. "No," I said grumpily. "That's mine." Bob tucked his tail under and walked off slowly, most likely hoping I'd have a change of heart and call him back.

Joe now had Joey and Jessie lying on top of a quilt he'd spread out on the floor. Jessie was on her back, one foot in the air, the other one sockless and now working it's way into her mouth. "_Joe_," I demanded irritably, "please get her foot out of her mouth."

He reached for one of her toys and placed it in her hand, slowly removing her foot. She started to fuss but quickly realized she had something new to chew. I frowned at Joe, then glanced over at Joey.

He was up on his knees, his palms flat on the floor, and he was rocking back and forth. "He wants to go so bad," Joe said, offering me one of his sexy smiles. "It won't be long, and he's going to be crawling all over the place."

I wanted to stay grouchy, but seeing Joe down on the floor with our babies gave me such a thrill that I just couldn't. He was so playful and hands-on with them, and I wanted to be a part of that, too. I grabbed my plate and scooted down onto the floor beside them.

"So, what's wrong?" Joe asked playfully, reaching out to tuck a stray curl behind my ear. "What has your mother done this time?"

"My mother ..." I paused and gritted my teeth. "My mother ... she just makes me so mad sometimes!"

Joe nodded and made himself comfortable on the floor, stretching out his long Levi's-clad legs, resting his elbow on the floor and using his palm to support his head. With his free hand, he reached out and gently pulled Jessie down closer to him, then proceeded to rub her bottom gum lightly with his fingertip. "I can feel that tooth underneath here," he said, while she began gnawing on his finger. "It won't be much longer before it breaks through."

I nodded my head and smiled. "Good. And maybe it'll be a _long time_ between this one and the second one."

Joe laughed and shifted his weight some, slowly reclaiming his finger in the process. Jessie immediately started crying, so he pulled himself up into a sitting position and picked her up, cradling her in his lap, the back of her head resting against his chest.

I took my final bite of sub and offered the rest to Bob. I wiped my hands on a paper towel, then settled back down on the floor, about a foot away from Joey. He lifted his head and offered me a toothless grin, drool dripping down in a steady stream, and his rocking motion picked up a little steam.

"_Come to Mommy_," I said, holding my hands out to him. "_You can do it_."

He rocked and grinned and then lowered his head, his forehead nearly touching the floor. He grunted, and then his knees collapsed, and he landed on his stomach. He lifted his head and looked up at me accusingly, his bottom lip pushed out in a pout.

I tried my best not to laugh, but I couldn't help it. He was so cute and so pitiful all at the same time, and he was definitely what I needed to lift my spirits. I reached out for him, drawing him closer until he was seated in my lap just as Jessie was in Joe's. I kissed the top of his head, then stared across at my husband and daughter, and almost immediately, I no longer cared about my mother and Christmas Eve dinner and Joe's family dining with mine.

I let out a sigh and met Joe's eyes. "Do you know what I'm responsible for tomorrow evening?"

Joe raised an eyebrow but didn't speak. He must have sensed the calming shift in my mood and was afraid he'd say the wrong thing and set me off again. No matter what the reason, he wisely stayed silent and waited for me to continue.

"Your mother and my mother both agreed that we could be responsible for supplying all of the wine. _Wine, Joe._ You know, something that's store-bought from a bottle. Or more specifically, something that _I_ can't screw up."

Joe scooted closer to me and leaned in for a kiss. His lips lightly touched mine, and then he smiled. "Okay, so we'll get the wine." He nuzzled the side of my neck with his nose and whispered just below my ear, "But that doesn't mean you still can't bake something, Cupcake."

Joey reached up and pulled on a strand of my hair, then tried his best to get a fistful of Joe's as well. Jessie began to squirm restlessly in Joe's lap, her arms reaching up and pushing against his chin, but he kissed me again, his breath hot on my skin. "How about something for dessert?" He ran his tongue seductively up the side of my neck, then drew my lobe between his teeth and bit down softly. "You know how much I _love_ dessert. You've certainly _never_ needed your mother's permission for that."

He pulled back slightly, and his brown eyes were now like melted chocolate, and I immediately felt a warm sensation spread throughout my body. "No," I whispered softly, then licked my lips instinctively. "I've never needed permission when it comes to dessert."

He cradled Jessie against his shoulder and slowly stood. "Why don't we get them down for the night, and then we can discuss in more detail exactly which dessert you're going to make." His voice was low and sensual, and I shivered in anticipation, knowing, without a doubt, Joe would be getting_ any_ dessert that he wanted.

* * *

Over two hours later, I was snuggled in the crook of Joe's arm, feeling much more relaxed and not nearly as concerned about the way both my mother and Mrs. Morelli had dismissed my abilities in the kitchen. At that moment, I was much more interested in my abilities in the _bedroom_, and judging by the smile on Joe's face, I was very confident that I wasn't at all lacking.

Joe picked up my hand and brought it to his mouth, gently planting kisses on my knuckles. "Now that all of that's settled," he said playfully, "how about we go back for seconds? Or would it be thirds?"

I laughed softly, then entwined my fingers with his, planting kisses on his side. I ran my leg along the length of his, enjoying the warmth, as well as the feel of his muscles, and I thought about how strong and masculine he was, and I began to reconsider his offer.

But thinking of his masculinity and how lucky I was to benefit from that, reminded me of how unlucky I'd once been, and that made me remember Dickie's phone call.

I propped myself up on my elbow and rested my hand on Joe's chest. "That reminds me," I said, "Dickie called here this evening."

"_Dickie_? What the hell did he want?" Joe asked gruffly, reaching out to smooth back a section of my hair.

"What's weird was he called on your cell phone," I said, leaning down to drop another kiss on that incredible body. "And he wanted to know if your Ducati was still for sale." I kissed him again, and I felt his body tense. His hand stayed caressing my hair, but he didn't speak. "Joe," I said softly, not wanting to look up but forcing myself to do so, "you aren't trying to sell the Duc, are you?"

His eyes met mine, and I knew instantly that ratface Dickie had been right. "_No," _I said firmly, "you are _not_ selling the Ducati."

His hand reached out to cradle my cheek, and he smiled weakly. "Cupcake, you know as well as I do the money we would make off of it could be put to good use. And owning a motorcycle just isn't practical for us any more."

He started to speak again, but I interrupted him. "Practical? What are you talking about, _practical_?" My brows drew together, and I frowned at him. "Who says I want to be practical? Practical is boring. Practical is for old people. We're not old. And we're definitely _not_ boring."

"Steph ..." he started, but I wasn't in the mood to listen.

"Joe, we don't need the money that badly. And if a loser like Dickie can consider even buying a Ducati, a hottie like you can most definitely keep his Ducati."

"A hottie, huh?" Joe repeated teasingly.

"I'm serious, Joe. You are _not _selling your motorcycle." I gave him another stern look, and he started to reply, but I cut him off again. "_No way_. Absolutely not. Discussion's over."

"Yes ma'am," he said, planting a kiss on my forehead. Then before I knew it, he'd flipped me over onto my back and was hovering above me. "I like it when you take charge." He bent down and began sucking the skin on the side of my neck, running his hands lightly down both sides of my body. "It's a real turn-on," he whispered, continuing his exploration.

I smiled and wrapped my legs around his waist. "So are we clear?" I asked him, pressing the palms of my hands against his chest, forcing his mouth away from my body.

"_Loud and clear_," he said seriously. His eyes flashed, and he raised an eyebrow. "So ... are you still in charge here or what?" He kissed a trail along my jawline, waiting for me to answer.

"Oh, yeah," I said, my voice filled with passion and heat. "I'm calling _all_ of the shots now." I pushed him over to the side, and he settled onto his back. I straddled his thighs and lifted his arms above his head, pinning them down. "I sure hope you can follow directions," I said playfully, nipping and kissing my way down his body. "Or you're going to have to be punished."

And before I knew it, I'd embarked on a serious exploration of my own, and Joe surrendered completely, thoughts of Ducati's and Dickie and money now the last thing on our minds.


	4. Chapter 4

Much to our delight, the babies slept in the next morning, so Joe and I were able to enjoy a replay of the night before. By the time we heard the first cry, Joe was raring to go, and I was buried beneath the covers, trying to get my brain to function after having experienced two super-incredible Morelli-induced orgasms.

"Sleep in," Joe said, tousling my hair. "I'll get them started on breakfast." I watched as he toweled his hair dry and pulled on a black thermal shirt and a pair of jeans. I let out a sigh as I closed my eyes, and thoughts of him on top of me pulled me back into a deep sleep.

Thirty minutes later, though, I was jolted awake at the sound of Bob barking. I yawned and stretched, then dragged myself out of bed and down to the kitchen. I'd just poured myself a glass of milk and was starting in on a bowl of Frosted Flakes when the doorbell rang.

Bob barked again, and Joe and I looked at each other. "Your mother's coming over_ this_ early?" he asked, a frown forming on his face.

I shrugged my shoulders and stood. "From the way she talked, she made it seem like she wouldn't be here until after lunch."

Joe walked to the counter and refilled his coffee cup. "Guess I better drink up. It's going to be a _long_ day."

"I'm sorry," I said, poking my bottom lip out in fake sympathy. I planted a quick kiss on him and grinned. "Little does she know she should be thanking you. Because of last night and this morning, I'm in an _extremely_ good mood today."

"Is that so?" Joe asked, pulling me closer to him, his hands encircling my waist, his thigh parting my legs.

The doorbell rang again, and I reluctantly pulled away. "Later for you," I told him, then I called out, "I'm on my way, _mo-ther_!"

I threw open the door, a huge grin on my face, until I saw who it was that stood before me. "_Mrs._ _Morelli?! Grandma Bella?!_ What are you two doing here?"

Grandma Bella raised an eyebrow at me and scowled. Mrs. Morelli patted my cheek and brushed past me. "Why we're here to bake, dear. I was under the assumption your mother had called you last night."

"Oh, uh, she did ..." I said, following them down the hall. "I guess I didn't understand ..."

"Ahhh, the bambino's are awake," Grandma Bella exclaimed. "Such precious angels." She walked over to their high chairs and kissed both of them on the top of their heads. "Just like my Joseph." She reached up and gently cradled Joe's cheek, then smacked him on the shoulder. "You weren't in church on Sunday," she fussed. "Everyone wanted to see my great-grandchildren, and I had to tell them they weren't there." Then her eyes met mine, and she glared.

"It's true," Mrs. Morelli added. "I so hoped you would've been there, Joseph and Stephanie. Father Gabriel was asking about little Joseph and Jessica."

Joe leaned back against the kitchen counter and took a sip of his coffee. "We weren't in church on Sunday?" he asked teasingly. "Are you sure?" His eyes met mine, and he smiled. "That's so strange. It's as if I can recall the sermon word for word."

He sat his mug on the countertop and grinned. "_Oh, I know why_. It's because Father Gabriel recycles his sermons. The same one. Year after year after year. Stephanie and I talked about going, but since we still remembered it, we figured we were good at least until next Christmas. Maybe even the one after that."

Grandma Bella smacked him again, a bit harder this time, and frowned.

"That's not funny, Joseph," his mother said. She unbuttoned her coat and handed it to him. "Be a dear and bring in the groceries from the back seat." She pulled out the chair I'd been sitting in and sat down in front of Joey and Jessica. "We have a lot to do today, but I want to visit with my grandchildren first."

Joey banged on his tray with a spoon, then leaned forward, trying to shove it in Mrs. Morelli's face. Jessie was staring at Grandma Bella with a very worried look on her face, but she didn't make a sound. It was almost as if she were afraid of what would happen if she did.

"The coffee smells delicious," Mrs. Morelli remarked. I did a mental eye roll and plastered on a smile. "Would either of you care for a cup?"

Grandma Bella started to shake her head, until I added, "_Joseph made it_."

"Well of course I would," she snapped. Then she turned to Mrs. Morelli. "To this day, I still say that Joseph's coffee has to be the best I've ever had."

I sloshed some into a mug and placed it in front of her. "Milk? Sugar?" She shook her head and took a sip. "I never knew a man who could make coffee as well as Joseph."

I forced back a laugh and smiled. "Oh, _wait a minute,"_ I lied_. "I_ made the coffee this morning." I gave her my sweetest smile, then turned around quickly. "But I'm so glad it meets your approval."

I reached for another mug and poured Mrs. Morelli a cup. I ignored the dirty look that Grandma Bella was giving me and moved to take the seat on the other side of the high chairs. I picked up Jessie's spoon and dipped it into the bowl in front of me.

"Oh, would you mind if I did that?" Mrs. Morelli asked, reaching for the spoon. "And perhaps after she finishes eating, I could take her upstairs and dress her. I'd love to see her in one of those precious outfits I've bought her."

"Of course," I said through clenched teeth, forcing yet another smile on my face. "Why don't I check and see if Joe needs any help? It sure is taking him a long time."

I rushed from the kitchen and found him coming down the stairs. "What are you doing?! You're supposed to be bringing in groceries?" I planted my hands on my hips and stared him down. "They're _your_ family. Don't leave me alone with them like that."

He simply laughed and patted my head. "Come on now, Steph. Grandma Bella's not that bad. And because of you, I now have to claim Grandma Mazur and Albert and Valerie. That's three kooks compared to my one. Do you really have any right to complain?"

I narrowed my eyes at him and attempted to push him towards the front door. "Just get the groceries and get back in there with me."

Just as I turned to make my way back into the kitchen, Mrs. Morelli came walking out with Jessie in her arms. "Little Joseph's still eating, but I think Jessica's ready to get dressed for the day. And I know the perfect outfit for her to wear." She made her way over to the stairs, then paused to give a smile. "That is, if it isn't in the dirty laundry." I watched her disappear with my daughter and fought the urge to stick my tongue out at her.

"Grab this one," Joe said as he shoved a bag into my arms. He kicked backwards and shut the door with his foot, then proceeded to push me down the hall towards the kitchen. "I don't wanna go in there," I whined, but happily my son made it all worthwhile. No sooner had I stepped in the kitchen did Joey proceed to spray Grandma Bella with a mouthful of cereal and peaches.

"Does someone have a full tummy?" I asked with a snicker. Joe shot me a look then quickly rinsed a washcloth and offered it to his grandmother.

"Sorry about that," Joe said, as he unbuckled Joey and lifted him from the seat. "We're still working on our table manners, aren't we little guy?" Joe planted a kiss on his cheek, then passed him over to me. "I'll clean this up if you'll take care of him."

Grandma Bella removed her coat and wiped her face. "Oh, don't worry about me," she told Joe. "He may look like a Morelli, but I always keep it in the back of my mind that he still has some Plum in him. That way I'm never surprised when something unfortunate happens."

I started to say something just as nasty, but Joe quickly turned me in the opposite direction and pushed me out the door. "Happy thoughts," he whispered. "Remember, it's the day before Christmas."

I rolled my eyes and fought back the urge to scream. "Let's get these bags unloaded," I heard him say. "You and Mom don't want to be stuck here cooking all day."

* * *

An hour later the doorbell rang again, and I now had to fight the urge to strangle my mother. "Why didn't you tell me they were coming over here?" I asked in a whisper as soon as I opened the door.

"Well it's nice to see you, too, Stephanie." She pulled off her gloves, unbuttoned her coat, and smiled sweetly. "And I most certainly _did_ tell you. You just don't listen to me."

"No, Mom, that's something I would've heard._ Trust me_."

She stood there, lost in thought, and then simply shrugged her shoulders. "You know, maybe I didn't. I can't honestly remember for sure."

"Stephanie," Mrs. Morelli called from the kitchen, "do you have a meat thermometer? I can't seem to find one anywhere."

_"Help me,"_ I mouthed to my mother. "_Please_."

She disappeared down the hall, and I hurried into the living room. Joe had the babies in their swings, and he was watching ESPN.

"So your mom's finally here, huh?"

"Yes, _thank God_." I sat down on the couch next to him and yawned, wishing I could rest my head on his shoulder and sleep for hours.

"Does that mean you're going to hide out with us now?" He picked up my leg and rested my foot in his lap. "Would a foot massage help?" he asked as he began to knead my toes.

"Oh God, yes," I said on a moan. "It would help _a lot_."

* * *

The five of us managed to survive lunch together while Joey and Jessica were upstairs taking their nap. Grandma Bella and Mrs. Morelli continuously fawned all over Joe, while I did a lot of mental eye-rolling and fake smiling. Afterwards, we, meaning Joe and myself, were kicked out of our own kitchen and forced to kick back and relax in the living room.

"Okay, so maybe this isn't that bad, after all," I admitted. "So nobody wants to eat my cooking. Big deal. I'd rather be here with you, being a big old bum."

"Mmm-hmm," Joe said, as he snuggled me closer and kissed my temple. "Of course, you still have a dessert to make ..."

"Nope," I interrupted. "Doesn't matter now. I mean, why should I bother? I don't need to prove anything to them. I know I can bake. I know I'm not a total disaster in the kitchen. I know ..."

Joe grinned, then lifted my chin so he could plant a kiss on my lips. "Just admit it, Cupcake. You're not making a dessert now, because you don't want to stop being a lazy bum long enough to do it."

I pushed his chest playfully and fought back a smile. "No, that's not ... oh, all right, so that is why. But it's not like we're going to be short on sweets."

Joe laughed and rested his chin on the top of my head. "I'd rather have you right here with me anyway. This is nice."

"Yeah, it is," I said softly, picking up his hand and joining his fingers with mine. "I like spending time with you. Just the two of us."

And no sooner had I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned in for a kiss did we hear the sound of two crying babies, reminding us they weren't to be forgotten.

Over an hour later, the doorbell rang again, and I shook my head. "I'm not answering that."

"Steph, go get the door. I'm in the middle of this," Joe said, pointing to the dirty diaper he was in the process of removing from Joey's bottom.

"Alright," I said begrudgingly. "But only because you're cleaning poop."

I opened the door to find a seventy-five year old elf on our doorstep.

"_Really, Grandma_?" I asked, shaking my head. I shut the door behind her and stood there staring. Thinking back on it, I wasn't sure why I was shocked, but for some reason, I honestly hadn't seen that one coming.

"Ain't it a pip?" she asked, shaking one of her wrists and tilting her head from side to side so that the bells on her hat would jingle even louder. "I borrowed it from Louise. She's dressin' up as a rag doll. You know, like Raggedy Ann. And she's gonna put a bow 'round her neck like she's a present. And Harry and Fred are dressing up as reindeer. We're puttin' on a Christmas show down at the Senior Center tonight."

Joe walked by with the dirty diaper in his hand. "Need a present for someone you hate? I've got the perfect thing right here."

I covered my nose and made a face. "Gross."

"Nah, don't need no dirty diaper, but you got something else I need. And it's the perfect thing all right."

"What's that, Grandma?"

"I need those beautiful babies of yours," she exclaimed. Then she held up a Macy's bag and gave it a shake. "What size do the little munchkins wear?"

Just then Grandma Bella, Mrs. Morelli, and my mother walked out of the kitchen. "Good Lord," my mother exclaimed, and she quickly turned back and disappeared behind the kitchen door.

"Edna, how nice to see you again," Mrs. Morelli said politely, never once taking her eyes off of Grandma's costume.

"What kind of fool thing are you up to this time?" Grandma Bella asked. Joe shook his head and slipped past us, smartly retreating back into the living room.

"Bella ..." Mrs. Morelli started to say, but Grandma Mazur interrupted her before she could finish.

"Ain't no concern of yours," Grandma Mazur told her. "It involves Christmas spirit and spreading good cheer and having fun. And you don't know squat about any of those things."

"Why you old bat," Grandma Bella exclaimed, but Grandma Mazur interrupted her.

"Now don't go gettin' _too_ upset, Bella. If I'm remembering right, Fred says we might have a need for someone to play Ebenezer Scrooge. Now that I think about it, you'd be perfect for the part. In fact, I can't see no one but you playing it."

"You old goat! I've had about enough from you. I've tried to be good," she said to no one in particular, "out of respect for my great-grandbabies, but enough is enough. It's about time this fool was taught a lesson. I'm going to have to put the eye ..."

"You are _not_ putting the eye on anyone!" Mrs. Morelli said. My mother had ventured out from her kitchen hiding place and had joined us in the foyer.

"Mother," she said, "what's in the bag?"

My mother was the queen of distraction, and thankfully it worked. Everyone's attention was now focused on finding out what Grandma Mazur had bought at Macy's.

"Why this is for Joey and Jessie," Grandma Mazur said, holding the bag up high. "And it's the reason I'm here." Then she turned her attention to me. "We've been scratchin' our heads tryin' to figure out who's gonna be our Santa and Mrs. Claus, and then it dawned on me that the answer was right here."

I immediately started shaking my head. "No, Grandma. Nu-uh. _No_."

"Now whatcha mean '_no_?' You haven't even seen what I've got inside here." She reached in the bag and pulled out two of the most gawdy outfits I'd ever seen.

"This one here's for Joey, cuz it's got the pants. And this one here's almost like a Santa outfit except it's got a skirt, so I figure that'll pass as Mrs. Claus." She turned and held the outfits up for everyone else to see. "Ain't they the cutest things? Everyone at the center's gonna go crazy over the two of them. They'll be the hit of our show for sure."

"Did those really come from Macy's, Grandma?" I asked in disbelief.

"Well, no, that was the only bag I could find to put 'em in. I got 'em down at the thrift shop on Kindle Avenue."

I was immediately repulsed and relieved all at the same time. As God-awful as they were, I had to admit that my first thought was gratitude that my faith in the buyers for Macy's was restored.

Mrs. Morelli stared at them, horrified, and Grandma Bella made a scoffing noise. "You sure about the 'no eye' rule, Angie?" she asked. "You might want to reconsider that now that she's trying to involve the Morelli's in her craziness."

"_Morelli's_?" Grandma Mazur repeated. "This ain't got nothin' to do with the Morelli's, you crazy witch. Devil woman's what you are. Always dressed in black ..."

"At least I'm not running around in green tights," Grandma Bella countered. "And obviously you've forgotten that those two babies in there are both Morelli's. They're not Joseph and Jessica Plum. They're not Joseph and Jessica Mazur. They're Joseph and Jessica _Morelli_. That means we've got more claim to them than you do."

"_Is that so_?" Grandma Mazur asked, pushing closer to Grandma Bella, the bells on her costume jingling like mad.

"Yes, it is," Grandma Bella retorted. "And don't you forget it."

"Joe?" I cried out. "_Joe!_"

"Edna, Bella," Mrs. Morelli interjected. "That's enough. Certainly it's up to Joseph and Stephanie if they want to dress little Joseph and Jessica in those costumes," she said, pointing to the ridiculous outfits. "They're the ones who need to decide whether or not the babies can participate in Edna's show."

All eyes turned to me, and I stood there motionless.

"Well?" Grandma Bella asked curtly. "Are you going to allow my great-grandchildren to be dressed up like miniature fools and paraded around like circus freaks at some old-folks home?"

"Circus freaks?" Grandma Mazur repeated. "It's Santa and Mrs. Claus, you old fart. That ain't got a thing to do with the circus. Now if I'd bought clown outfits then that'd be different ..."

"Stop!" I finally yelled out, pressing my hands on both sides of my head. "Just stop it!"

The room was silent, and we all stood frozen for a moment. Then I turned to Grandma Bella and pointed my finger. "Yes, my children have the same last name as you, but that doesn't mean they're not a part of my family, too. And like it or not, that means Grandma Mazur is also their great-grandmother. You can't change that, so just let it go!"

"And you two!" I said accusingly to my mother and Mrs. Morelli. "I can cook, dammit! Joe and I have been married for three years now, and during that time, we've gotten pretty good at cooking our own dinners. Sure, I can't make your manicotti perfectly," I said to Mrs. Morelli, "and I can't make a pineapple upside-down cake just like you do," I pointed to my mother, "but that doesn't mean I'm helpless with a pot and pan."

Then I whirled around to face my grandmother. "And as much as I love you, there is no way on earth I am letting you dress my babies in those outfits. Not to mention, it's _Christmas Eve,_ Grandma. They can't go with you tonight and be in a show at the Senior Center. _Okay_? They have to be here. With their mommy and their daddy. And Bob and Rex. After everyone leaves tonight, they have to sit in their high chairs while Joe and I bake cookies. And then we're going to decorate them, and I'm going to sneak both of them their very first taste of frosting. And I'm going to make hot chocolate and play Christmas music, and then we're going to open one present for each of them tonight. Because that's what you do when you're a kid on Christmas Eve. You get to open one present. Then you set out milk and cookies for Santa and then you go to bed. And that's what we're going to do. Because this is _my_ family now, Grandma. I've waited a long time for this, and so has Joe. And no one ... not a single one of you ... is going to ruin anything for me. _For us_."

I took a deep breath and blew it out on a sigh, and when I finally spoke again, my tone was softer and much more subdued. "This is our first Christmas as parents, and I want to enjoy every single minute of it. Please don't ruin this for us." I wiped a tear from my eye and focused on Grandma Bella. "Please stop being mean to my grandmother." Then I turned to Grandma Mazur. "And please try to behave at supper tonight."

Mrs. Morelli patted my arm and smiled. "What about Midnight Mass, dear? You forgot to include that ..."

The evil glare I shot her silenced her immediately, and everyone stood around quietly, not knowing exactly what to say. After a minute or two, I heard Joe calling for me. "Steph, come here! _Quick_!"

I hurried into the living room and watched as my precious baby boy was slowly scooting himself across the floor. "Oh my gosh!" I cried out. "He's crawling!"

Joe had already grabbed the camcorder and was filming, so I immediately dropped to the floor, less than a foot from Joey. "Come here, baby," I said, holding my arms out to him. "Come to Mommy."

He lifted his head and grinned, then tucked his chin down and pushed forward. Minutes later, his tiny hand reached out and touched my mouth, and before I could stop myself, a few tears dropped down onto the floor between us. "_You did it_!" I said softly, pulling him to me and wrapping him in my arms. I kissed him softly and hugged him tight, and Joe put down the camera and joined us. "Way to go," he told him, before he pulled both of us to him for a hug. "Now there's no stopping you, huh?"

Two grandmother's and two great-grandmother's stood on in silence, watching such a special moment unfold, and I think it was in that instant we all realized that no matter what, precious moments like that were what it was all about.

Joe freed Jessie from her bouncy seat and planted a kiss on the tip of her nose. "You're next, princess."

Everyone else proceeded to hug Joey and kiss Jessie, and then they all offered their apologies. My mother and Mrs. Morelli and Grandma Bella retreated back to the kitchen, and Grandma Mazur said her goodbyes.

"You're absolutely right, Stephanie," she said, as I walked her to the door. "Those babies need to be here with their Momma and Daddy. I don't know what I was thinking." She stopped for a moment and then grinned. "But you know what? I got a better idea. I saw a real skimpy Mrs. Claus outfit at the thrift shop, and I betcha anything I can get Lula to wear it. And Tank'll make the perfect Santa."

Having settled that, she gave me a hug and jingled out the door.

I closed my eyes and shook my head, then rejoined my family in the living room. Visions of crawling babies and first teeth, presents from Santa and a pair of brown bedroom eyes danced in my head. What a wonderful Christmas it was going to be!


End file.
